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Tales of the Cocktail 2015: Where to Eat Drunk or Hungover In The Quarter

by Gwendolyn Knapp
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by Gwendolyn Knapp

Eater is right smack in the middle of Cheap Eats Week right now, but fear not, thousands of Tales of the Cocktail attendees, we have you covered too. Right now there are two important questions you're likely asking: Where can I go to eat when I'm this drunk OR where can I go to eat when I'm this hungover?

Now, ignoring the fine dining and healthier options that are within walking distance of the French Quarter, Eater offers the greasiest, best bad-for-you places for dining drunk or hungover within walking distance of Tale's epicenter, the Hotel Monteleone.  Lots of these spots are open for breakfast and/or for late night dining.

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Note: Restaurants on this map are listed geographically.

1. Clover Grill

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900 Bourbon St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 598-1010
(504) 598-1010
Visit Website
A 24 hour diner on Bourbon where you're always guaranteed to see quite an eclectic group of critters (read: Quarter People) grabbing their late night snack. The burger tastes great drunk, and it's cooked under a hubcap.

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2. Coop's Place

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1109 Decatur St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 525-9053
(504) 525-9053
Visit Website
A huge plate of red beans and rice with sausage, or some fried chicken are a tried and true hangover helper. Though many a group of drunkards use this as a gathering spot to sober up or even pre-game.

3. Verti Marte

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1201 Royal St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 525-4767
(504) 525-4767
There is a magical store on Royal that actually serves fried foods, po boys, and mac & cheese so good that people will open the styrofoam containers out front and eat while using a garbage can or stranger's car as their table. These people are called drunks. This store is called Verti Marte.

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4. Vieux Carre Pizza

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733 St Louis St.
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 529-1999
(504) 529-1999
For a late night slice. The scariest of the drunkypants food offerings, if you actually remember stumbling toward the neons like a moth into light, for shame. They're open until 4:30 a.m. on Friday and Saturday.

5. The Grill

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540 Chartres St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 522-1800
(504) 522-1800
Visit Website
This is the downtown location of the famous New Orleans greasy spoon, Camellia Grill, but a burger and chili are still just as good for drunk food, or the morning after.

6. St. Lawrence

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Upscale compared to a lot of this list, St. Lawrence serves food late into the night, including wings and great sandwiches. Plus, they have Pimm's Cup frozen daiqs and an insanely good cheese dip. Open until 2 a.m. every day.

7. Acme Oyster House

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724 Iberville St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 522-5973
(504) 522-5973
Visit Website
Fried shrimp, fried oysters, and french fries? That's a dream meal for the drunk, and they're open until 11 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays.

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8. Café Du Monde

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800 Decatur St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 525-4544
(504) 525-4544
Visit Website
It's a tourist trap, sure, whatever, but between the hours of 1-5 a.m. it's more like a drunk-magnet.

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9. Killer Po-boys

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811 Conti St
New Orleans, LA 70112
(504) 252-6745
(504) 252-6745
This pop up in Erin Rose features internationally-inspired new school po boys that kick ass...think pork belly, lamb, and meatloaf...and best of all they're located in a bar, so you can continue your quest toward total shitfacedom, or have some hair of the dog.

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10. Stanley

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547 Saint Ann St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 587-0093
(504) 587-0093
Visit Website
Scott Boswell's upscale greasy spoon/soda counter has all sorts of hangover favorites including a slew of egg specialties, a rather excellent gumbo and a trio of fried po boy sliders.

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11. Somethin' Else Café

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620 Conti St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 373-6439
(504) 373-6439
Visit Website
The breakfast specials, including Egg in Da Hole and the Crab Cake are good for hangovers. They have chicken fried bacon, seriously. And the biscuits are legit. Plus, the kitchen is open til 3 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays, for drunk food like burgers and po boys.

12. Johnny's Po-Boys

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511 Saint Louis St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 524-8129
(504) 524-8129
Visit Website
This old-school greasy spoon po boy shop has tons of breakfast options, including eggs and catfish, and then turns out po boys, huge lunch specials, muffulettas, and pretty much anything you could ever dream of curing your hangover.

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13. Mother's Restaurant

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401 Poydras St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 523-9656
(504) 523-9656
Visit Website
If you want to party like Beyonce, you must also eat like her. At this lunchtime institution, she once ordered the calamari.

14. Central Grocery Co.

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923 Decatur St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 523-1620
(504) 523-1620
Muffuletta is all about keeping greasiness on the down low, with a layer of oil that the bread soaks up, and that, with the addition of meat and olive salad, creates perfect hangover sandwich synergy. The wait in line, however, will be painful.

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1. Clover Grill

900 Bourbon St, New Orleans, LA 70116
A 24 hour diner on Bourbon where you're always guaranteed to see quite an eclectic group of critters (read: Quarter People) grabbing their late night snack. The burger tastes great drunk, and it's cooked under a hubcap.
900 Bourbon St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 598-1010
Visit Website

2. Coop's Place

1109 Decatur St, New Orleans, LA 70116
A huge plate of red beans and rice with sausage, or some fried chicken are a tried and true hangover helper. Though many a group of drunkards use this as a gathering spot to sober up or even pre-game.
1109 Decatur St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 525-9053
Visit Website

3. Verti Marte

1201 Royal St, New Orleans, LA 70116
There is a magical store on Royal that actually serves fried foods, po boys, and mac & cheese so good that people will open the styrofoam containers out front and eat while using a garbage can or stranger's car as their table. These people are called drunks. This store is called Verti Marte.
1201 Royal St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 525-4767

4. Vieux Carre Pizza

733 St Louis St., New Orleans, LA 70116
For a late night slice. The scariest of the drunkypants food offerings, if you actually remember stumbling toward the neons like a moth into light, for shame. They're open until 4:30 a.m. on Friday and Saturday.
733 St Louis St.
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 529-1999

5. The Grill

540 Chartres St, New Orleans, LA 70130
This is the downtown location of the famous New Orleans greasy spoon, Camellia Grill, but a burger and chili are still just as good for drunk food, or the morning after.
540 Chartres St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 522-1800
Visit Website

6. St. Lawrence

New Orleans, LA
Upscale compared to a lot of this list, St. Lawrence serves food late into the night, including wings and great sandwiches. Plus, they have Pimm's Cup frozen daiqs and an insanely good cheese dip. Open until 2 a.m. every day.

7. Acme Oyster House

724 Iberville St, New Orleans, LA 70130
Fried shrimp, fried oysters, and french fries? That's a dream meal for the drunk, and they're open until 11 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays.
724 Iberville St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 522-5973
Visit Website

8. Café Du Monde

800 Decatur St, New Orleans, LA 70116
It's a tourist trap, sure, whatever, but between the hours of 1-5 a.m. it's more like a drunk-magnet.
800 Decatur St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 525-4544
Visit Website

9. Killer Po-boys

811 Conti St, New Orleans, LA 70112
This pop up in Erin Rose features internationally-inspired new school po boys that kick ass...think pork belly, lamb, and meatloaf...and best of all they're located in a bar, so you can continue your quest toward total shitfacedom, or have some hair of the dog.
811 Conti St
New Orleans, LA 70112
(504) 252-6745

10. Stanley

547 Saint Ann St, New Orleans, LA 70116
Scott Boswell's upscale greasy spoon/soda counter has all sorts of hangover favorites including a slew of egg specialties, a rather excellent gumbo and a trio of fried po boy sliders.
547 Saint Ann St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 587-0093
Visit Website

11. Somethin' Else Café

620 Conti St, New Orleans, LA 70130
The breakfast specials, including Egg in Da Hole and the Crab Cake are good for hangovers. They have chicken fried bacon, seriously. And the biscuits are legit. Plus, the kitchen is open til 3 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays, for drunk food like burgers and po boys.
620 Conti St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 373-6439
Visit Website

12. Johnny's Po-Boys

511 Saint Louis St, New Orleans, LA 70130
This old-school greasy spoon po boy shop has tons of breakfast options, including eggs and catfish, and then turns out po boys, huge lunch specials, muffulettas, and pretty much anything you could ever dream of curing your hangover.
511 Saint Louis St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 524-8129
Visit Website

13. Mother's Restaurant

401 Poydras St, New Orleans, LA 70130
If you want to party like Beyonce, you must also eat like her. At this lunchtime institution, she once ordered the calamari.
401 Poydras St
New Orleans, LA 70130
(504) 523-9656
Visit Website

14. Central Grocery Co.

923 Decatur St, New Orleans, LA 70116
Muffuletta is all about keeping greasiness on the down low, with a layer of oil that the bread soaks up, and that, with the addition of meat and olive salad, creates perfect hangover sandwich synergy. The wait in line, however, will be painful.
923 Decatur St
New Orleans, LA 70116
(504) 523-1620

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