February 14 is a day to celebrate love (so they say). It's the day to keep that fire burning by buying flowers and oversized stuffed teddy bears and paying entirely too much for a mediocre prix fixe menu at your second- or third-choice restaurant. But what if the fire has died and is beyond rekindling? Then V-Day becomes an excellent, if slightly dark, opportunity to end that relationship in an especially noteworthy way. If that's the direction you're leaning, then this map is for you.
This map is decidedly heavy on dive bars. That's because these places are dark, loud, shitty and have free-flowing booze?all of which, while maybe not making the break-up any easier, at least reflects the awfulness of breaking up. Of this category, special mention has to go to uptown college dive F&M's, where getting broken up with is known as getting "fumped." Much love and sympathy to whoever coined that term.
And to anyone whose significant other suggests going to any of these places on
Valentine's Day Black Tuesday, be on the lookout, that might be a sign that he or she is just not that into you.