Control yourself, boo. C-Tates' Saints and Sinners just released their new menu, which according to their sexy sumptuous website won't just blow your mind, but like, other things too. Saints & Sinners "harkens back to the days when bordellos were where you went for heavenly company and a sinfully good time." Except now you go for a $40 Fat Madam Burger and Red Hottie Velvet Cake (Channing's favorite).
The menu has an easy to follow guide for building your own salad, because sometimes it gets hard to pick 5 items, "add a protein", and decide if you want your sexy ruffage in a "freshly made tortilla bowl" with all the snakeskinz destracting you after that heavy Zumba sesh.
Here are C-Tates sexiest menu options (with sumptuous description):
· Olivia's Oysters, Naked or Down & Dirty: These oysters are named after Storyville icon Olivia the Oyster Dancer because she know "how to make patrons drool. Which is why these little numbers 'bare' her name."
· Dix Sticks: "Heavenly beignet sticks dusted with powdered sugar. Sweet-mannered Basin Street madam Gertrude Dix would approve."
· Hot Head Hot Wings: "Unlike the notoriously fiery-tempered madam Kate Townsend, these smokin' hot wings will go down without a fight — we promise!"
Finally, a place where you don't have to roofie your chicken wings. With all this historical accuracy, C-Tates should be a history professor, but like, a sexy topless one who's absolutely upset about the male stripper rumors. Sadly, there are no Tatum Skinz on the menu. But there are Cheese Kurtz, which are deep fried cheese sticks named in honor of C-Tates' business partner.
· All Tatum Mania [ENOLA]